Random Thoughts on a Lazy Friday

Every day, without fail, I read the transcript of a Scrubs episode, and the Memorable Quotes of a random movie off IMDB. Today was One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

My workday is so much better after the Mavs win. Even if I do happen to forget my newly loaded and recharged iPod at home.

I've been applying Neosporin to my junk every time I go to the bathroom because I chafed the shit out of it while running. Even the universe conspires to keep me fat.

Now if this isn't the most blatantly obvious piece of news I've ever read...

And if this doesn't show how cheap life can be. Seriously, I'd be pissed if someone only wanted to pay 100 dollars to have me bumped off. I figure I'm worth at least five large.

edit: The phrase "clean your clock" ranks up there with "punch your lights out" in the "funniest ways to describe how you're going to hit someone" catgory.

edit #2: It's impossible to listen to Carl Douglas' "Kung Fu Fighting" without smiling like a dumbass and doing kung fu motions, while imagining you're drunk and singing this song at karaoke.